Underneath My Eyes, My Face.

Hard ground
Nothing new though.
I want to stand and melt into the earth.
Then the sky could rock me back and forth.
And I could drift to sleep.
Eyes are open now.
And the earth is still beneath me.
Rock me to sleep please.
Turn off the lights.
And I'll dream for you.

I don't know. Maybe.

We all need something to distract us from ourselves. I use school and music and homework. And then I repeat. I don't know. I lost myself a few weeks ago. I've given up looking. And now I'm stuck. Maybe when I do eventually find myself, I won't like who I am. I'll be... I don't know. Bad. God wouldn't let me be that, would he? I'm so scared. We choose to be who we are. Right? I don't know. Anything. But what if I'm on the completely wrong path? What if finding ourselves is not what we're supposed to do? What if we're supposed to create ourselves completely. I've tried that though. I don't know where to start. I need just one step. A clue to help me find my body. And sanity. My talents don't help. They just tell me who I am physically. What about my inside? My feelings. Someone help please. Or maybe not. Maybe I'm just over-reacting and maybe none of this makes sense. All I can do is keep distracting myself. School. Music. Homework.


Repeat.